Because i didn't cum Monday night, Master allowed me to try again last night. i suggested seeing a picture of Him would help. Um.......no. It didn't work either. He must be present in order for me to cum. i told Him this morning that i doubt i will bother to ask anymore.

How do i feel about this control over me?

At first, my immediate and initial reaction, i felt defeated. This physical pleasure has been taken away from me. Then, after the moment settled, i felt better. Master wanted this control over me. He has succeeded in taking it. i've always wanted Him to have it. i want to be totally immersed in Him. i want Him to have everything. Most days i think He already does and then other days we've found something else i have given up to Him. Days like that amaze me. i always wonder what else can i give, or what can He take, when i already feel like He has it all.

Master walked me through cumming on my way to work this morning. i told Him i wanted to be fucked so bad i could have fucked the steering wheel! Seriously. Then at lunch today, He had me remove my panties as i drove around town and had me edge once before allowing me to go into the store - still naked. When i arrived back at work i wasn't allowed to put them back on either, so i am sitting here at my desk blogging with no panties on.

i've started reading a book my best suggested. Consequences. i am finding it quite interesting. i will talk more about the book later, but i did read something that i couldn't agree with more today.

~Following rules makes life better, more pleasant.~

i completely agree. Following Masters rules, my daily routine, makes things so much easier. i am free and happy from making any and all decisions. i wouldn't change a thing.